Today I buried my family. I SkIMped all the relatives in my Mom’s contacts – got about five answers, none of them close enough to offer more than condolences. I didn’t want to try the neighbours just yet – they’re probably going through the same thing. There won’t be any emergency services or undertakers on call for a long time yet, so I dug the graves myself, and wrapped each of them up and buried them. We’re not what you’d call a church-going family, but Mom and Dad would sometimes say a prayer when times were tough, and Carla was a pretty keen curser, so I put together some crosses to mark the graves. I thought about calling a priest to do funerals, but it’d be better not to have anybody come in, in case of infection – mine or theirs.
There are a ton of funeral service templates on the socnets right now, did you know that? You can just fill in the names and a few choice memories and download pre-recorded services, complete with music. I didn’t do that. I used some of the questions they give you about the departed to put together my own. I pulled some good recent photos off my skystore and added the names and dates, then printed and laminated them to staple onto the crosses. Worst bit was when I couldn’t remember the year Dad was born and almost got out my handset to SkIMp Carla. The last thing I did was promise them I’d take care of the farm. It’s their legacy, my inheritance. It’s all I have left of them.
When you’re alone it’s easy to go into denial, and it still feels like they’re away at the produce fair or sitting up in the house, not lying under the ground by the herb garden. I catch myself forgetting all the time, not wanting to believe it. You get distracted, doing the daily chores like normal, it’s difficult to focus on. You just have that feeling of something missing, like there’s something you forgot to do and it’ll come back to you any minute, but you’re not gonna think about it yet, you’re gonna get on with what you need to do first. I’m getting the farm in order, tending the crops for autumn, preparing to plant the winter root veg, looking up any fertilisers or sprays they’re gonna need. It’s all about putting things in the ground. That’s what I got to do now. Just get it all buried.